Naturally, as someone who hasn’t had a sip of alcohol in a year, I celebrated with an elderberry mule on a sticky Tuesday afternoon with my dad.
Heading to the restaurant after hitting golf balls at the range, I felt like a twenty-one-year-old who was about to have their first legal drink. I was both giddy with excitement to re-enter the “cool kids” and nervous about how my body was going to react — would I be drunk after one drink?!
Two sips in, the high faded. Sure, it tasted decent, but it wasn’t anything special.
I think I’d tricked myself into thinking I’d like alcohol more after not drinking it for a year. Or that the fizziness of it wouldn’t burn my stomach. Or that I’d sleep like a baby.
Silly me.
I knew by the end of the night I’d give it back up again — for a long, long time (forever?!).
There’s no juicy story behind why I stopped drinking.
I never had a problem with consuming alcoholic beverages daily or in copious amounts. Save for my twenty-first birthday and my first night out in New Zealand, nights I don’t remember are due to my poor memory from 3 concussions and not too many gin and tonics.
I did, however, have a fear of losing control — there was a high schooler in my area who fell off a two-story house because he was so intoxicated (he lived) — and was well aware of my family history of alcoholism (a generation removed). Also, alcohol and my GI issues didn’t mix well the next morning, so I would always spend the ensuing AM in the bathroom. From what I could see, there weren’t many upsides to drinking, especially since I’d made it out of college and the FOMO associated with that phase of life.
And then May 2021 came around. I’d been sick with some wicked stomach bug for 3 weeks that left me unable to do much of anything besides sleep and go on the occasional short walk. I don’t know at what point I decided on it, but I came up with the idea of giving up alcohol (not out of character). Not sure how long it was going to last, I went day by day. The longer I went without, the more I owned the phrases “I don’t drink” and “designated driver.”
At first, I worried about social settings. How would others feel about me not drinking? What do I do with my hands at clubs or bars if I don’t have a drink in my hand?
I learned quickly that people don’t care what you do. They’ll likely ask why you don’t drink, but they don’t really care — they’re just nosy (If they do care, you need to find some other people to hang out with). So, it ended up not being as big of a thing as I’d thought.
What do I do at clubs or bars or breweries? Thankfully, I don’t go to clubs often, so this isn’t something I encounter much. On the off chance, I am out, water or soda does the trick. Most times, though, I don’t drink anything…saves me a few bucks.
My biggest takeaways
1// You don’t need alcohol to have fun. Life’s plenty fun without it.
2// Once you figure out what you value, you’ll naturally navigate toward others who live the same way.
—JTM