On our 12-hour drive from Atlanta to Ann Arbor this past Wednesday, A put on a Snacks podcast episode with guest, Tierna Davidson. The show is hosted by Sammy Mewis and Lynn Williams, both USWNT players, who give an insight into their lives as professional athletes both on and off the field.
In honor of Pride Month and the fact that Tierna is openly out, they dive into her experience as a queer white woman. What caught my attention the most was how she’d choose when to share this piece of her life with people both verbally and physically.
Oddly enough, I encountered a situation a few hours later where I got to experience just this.
A made a last-minute decision to visit her grandparents on our way up.
The plan was to just pop in, say hello briefly, and then get back on the road after thirty minutes or so.
They had no idea we were a couple — just two friends — and there was no intention to tell them. Hold back the PDA and avoid a few points of conversation and well, that’s a pro at least to two girls dating, we can appear as just really close best friends.
We were walking to the car and I was fully recharged after demolishing her 11-year-old cousin in two scooter rides, that I thought we’d managed to get out of there without an awkward confrontation.
But then, my pace sped up.
Being the situation that it was (or anything), it’s my job to be part of the team and walk next to her, no matter what. This wasn’t my family, so I’m there to swing if need be or walk peacefully — just waiting for the cue either way.
Unfortunately, even in this day and age, members of the LGBTQIA+ community still have to come out. Some people, no matter how much they say they love someone, cannot come to terms with this information. So they react in oftentimes unprecedented ways.
Thankfully, this didn’t happen.
I’ve noticed that most older people (not all) get a bit confused if you speak very fast and slightly incoherently. A took advantage of that here and started spewing a bunch of false information out of her mouth to her grandma.
It worked.
She got all of the words muddled and started laughing at A.
I’ve never driven away from someone’s house faster.
A few days later, I realized how much of a privilege I have in comparison to other marginalized communities.
Sure, I’m gay. I also happen to be white.
I can change my clothes and choose to not hold A’s hand, and people would more often than not assume I’m straight.
POC and others from marginalized communities do not have these luxuries. They cannot hide parts of themselves as easily, even if it’s a matter of safety. They carry the color of their skin and these outward traits with them everywhere they go.
So while I could sit here and complain that it’s difficult sometimes to be a gay, white female, I have the power to choose to share that part of myself with others or not.
I can hide. I can save myself from awkward double-takes, uncomfortable conversations, and life-threatening situations.
Others cannot.
They have to keep pressing on in the world no matter how many names they get called or obstacles stand in their way — that’s damn courageous.
Shipped this week
Ep. 73: The New Online MBA with MyMBA Founder, Grant Nissly
Grant Nissly, the founder of MyMBA started off doing what most mid-twenty-year-olds do after they've been working for a few years: think about what’s next.
While looking at options for an MBA and exploring the future of online education, Grant found an untapped market he wanted to explore. Could there be room for an MBA 100% online at a significantly reduced rate, but just a great of value? With sites such as Coursera and Khan Academy, people can learn anything online for free or at reduced costs. Why couldn’t they get an MBA online utilizing this wealth of information?
3 nuggets from the week
The Edit is Everything — Casey Nesitat (1 min)
You don't know what something's going to be while you're filming (living) it. Go out and do — absorb as much as you can. It’s only when you sit down to create/reflect on what you’ve compiled that you’ll figure out what you’re trying to say.The Psychology of Money — Morgan Housel (15 mins)
"Some people are born into families that encourage education; others are against it. Some are born into flourishing economies encouraging of entrepreneurship; others are born into war and destitution. I want you to be successful, and I want you to earn it. But realize that not all success is due to hard work, and not all poverty is due to laziness. Keep this in mind when judging people, including yourself."Life Reimagined Insights with Entrepreneur Dror Liebenthal — Calvin Rosser (7 mins)
Covers the importance of setting goals for where you are now, not far-off ambitious ones that are demoralizing. Also dotes on why you should work on projects sequentially to reap some of the benefits as you move along in the work.
Quote of the week
“The truth is that stress doesn’t come from your boss, your kids, your spouse, traffic jams, health challenges, or other circumstances. It comes from your thoughts about your circumstances.” — Andrew Bernstein
Keep rising,
JTM