A year ago this week, I started my first corporate-ish job (I don’t count an 8-person team as full-on corporate).
I cried on my first day.
It was terrible.
From the get-go, I could see the company was disorganized and scattered. I’ll never forget getting a phone call on Wednesday, April 7th from Tim at 9 AM asking if I was starting. No one had confirmed my start date, so I panicked and started my computer. When I was able to speak, I mentioned that I had already plans for the day and asked to move my start date…thankfully, I could.
I knew within the first 10 minutes the next day — my first official day — that a job entailing eight hours of answering the phone, troubleshooting tech issues, and responding to chat queries wasn’t the move for me.
Most days we didn’t have anything going on (I have no idea why they are in business, but that’s another story) so I’d twiddle my thumbs and try to do other things. For example, A and I drove 10 hours back from Michigan in August. I didn’t get a single message or call until 4:30 PM. At that point, I’d already been home for an hour and was on my way to happy hour with my parents. Some things you can’t make up.
Despite this extreme boredom, I was so torn over the fact that I should be working on things for the company that I couldn’t multitask very well.
Here I was finally with a steady income and a “real job” so naturally one would assume I’d be happy.
Quite the opposite. I was miserable.
I let the job turn me into a grump.
As a person who prior to this job was accustomed to waking up at 5:30 for kicks and giggles, I struggled to turn on my computer by 8 AM.
Eventually, I realized I need to change something.
I needed to find a new job, but doing something I actually enjoyed.
In September, after a few weeks without much luck, I landed a part-time job with a tech fellowship as a career TA. I’d always been interested in teaching, so I figured this would be a great way to test the waters. During this time, I also started freelancing.
By November, I’d more than doubled my income.
I was still working (and hating) my 9-5, but I liked what I saw in my bank account and didn’t want to let go of the security blanket it provided me. Also, to be transparent, I wasn’t having much luck applying for full-time roles, so I stopped and just accepted where I was. It wasn’t my ideal situation, but it was okay.
Then, on a random Tuesday in December, out of the blue, the company let me go. “They weren’t making enough money to keep me on full-time (shocker!).” I was instantly full of both relief and panic.
Questions flooded my mind:
What the heck was I supposed to do now?
Do I go full-time freelance?
Do I get another 9-5?
How do I get out of customer success?
I wasn’t back to square zero — where I was a year ago — because I did have money coming in, but I no longer had the safety blanket. On top of the money worry, I now was left with five 24-hour days to figure out what to do with myself.
Nothing seemed to be sticking. I couldn’t land another corporate job and freelancing work wasn’t flowing (I’ve now realized that the beginning of the year is sloooow) in as steadily as I would’ve liked. After a few weeks, I came to the realization that I needed to stop forcing things. I needed to believe in myself (in regard to my ability to get clients as a freelancer). I need to go all-in on something. I needed to lean into the opportunities that were presented to me and see where they led.
So I did.
For reference, here’s a snapshot of where my income has come from so far in 2022:
🥎 Coaching middle school softball
📝 Freelance copywriting (writing blog posts + newsletters + other content)
💻 Working as a Career TA for an online tech fellowship
🚵🏻♂️ Working at an outdoor activity center
By far the biggest catalyst for where I am now was saying yes to coaching softball at my old middle school. My dad asked me offhandedly as a joke one night. I paused. While I always shat on people who went back to their schools after they graduated, the idea seemed intriguing and I was looking for something to shake me out of the rut I was in.
Coaching softball has given me gave me a routine. Time outside in the sunshine. The opportunity to teach. The ability to share something I love with others. In-person interactions 5 days a week (probably the biggest win) with multiple people!
For lack of better words, it has given me a sense of purpose during one of the toughest periods of my life.
As the season is coming to a close in the next few weeks, I’ve recently found myself thinking about how much I like where I am right now in my life.
Overall, I’m happy.
If I really think about it, I’ve built the life I’ve been clawing for since graduating — one with freedom, flexibility, and people. Most importantly, a life on my own terms doing things that bring me joy.
Who knows where the rest of my 2022 income will come from, but as long as I keep chasing the things that bring me joy, I have no doubt I’ll be just fine.
I think it’s feasible for everyone to build a life full of doing what they love.
For some, that’s working a corporate job and spending the weekends golfing. For others, it’s starting their own business and working remotely. And then for others, it’s something more like my life — a hodgepodge of stuff.
It doesn’t matter what your answer is or how you get there. All that matters is that you keep chasing joy.
— JTM